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If You’re a Guy and Can’t Seem to Find ‘The One’

September 15, 2024 Tips Lifestyle Relationships
If You’re a Guy and Can’t Seem to Find ‘The One’

The Astrological Secrets Behind Men, Love, and Commitment

There’s a popular belief that men always know when they’re in love, and in our media, particularly in romantic comedies, the narrative often portrays men proposing marriage once they’ve figured it all out. This leads to the assumption that men are always the first to know when they’ve found “the one,” while women are left to decide whether to accept or reject their proposals. But is that really the case?

As an astrologer with nearly 20 years of experience, my observations often differ from these cultural assumptions. In fact, women tend to be more grounded and clear about whether a man is suitable for a long-term commitment. On the other hand, men often grapple more deeply with questions of love, emotions, and commitment. Surprisingly, more men come to me for consultations, asking, “Is she the one?”

In popular culture, men are often told to look for certain traits in women, like attractiveness and the ability to make them feel good. But those traits can apply to almost any fun weekend fling. The real question is: What is the X factor that tells a man whether a woman is someone to marry and build a life with?

 

 

Venus: The Planet of Attraction

To explore this, let’s start with Venus—the planet of love, romance, and femininity.

 

I like to call Venus “The Girlfriend Planet” because it governs the qualities that make a man feel butterflies, the excitement of being in love. For example, in a man’s birth chart, Venus reveals what traits he finds attractive and the type of woman who excites him.

 

The Moon: The Planet of Emotional Security

While Venus governs excitement and attraction, the Moon in a man’s chart speaks to emotional security, domestic life, and long-term commitment. It’s less about romance and more about the deeper connection needed to weather life’s ups and downs.

 

George Clooney: Hollywood’s Most Famous Bachelor?

Take George Clooney, for instance. Known as a longtime bachelor with a string of high-profile relationships, Clooney has Venus in Aries in his chart.

 

Aries is a fiery, energetic sign, and this placement suggests Clooney is drawn to feisty, youthful women who embody a certain spark. Over the years, Clooney’s girlfriends, like Stacy Keibler and Renée Zellweger, shared those vibrant qualities. But despite their fun and fiery natures, these women didn’t fully integrate into his life. Venus alone wasn’t enough to inspire long-term commitment.

In Clooney’s case, his Moon is in Capricorn, a very serious and grounded sign.

 

Capricorn values responsibility, maturity, and ambition. For Clooney to settle down, his partner needed to exhibit these qualities, which is why his eventual wife, Amal Clooney, a successful human rights lawyer, seemed to meet those standards. She wasn’t just a fun, fiery partner; she brought a sense of seriousness, community, and purpose into his life, aligning with his Moon’s needs.

So, while Clooney’s Venus in Aries was excited by passionate and vibrant women, it was his Moon in Capricorn that needed a partner who was stable, mature, and focused on bigger, more important things—qualities Amal perfectly embodied.

 

The Balance Between Attraction and Commitment

Men don’t necessarily “put aside” attraction (Venus) when they marry. Rather, a woman who embodies both the qualities of the girlfriend (Venus) and the wife (Moon) is what often leads to marriage. Clooney’s relationship with Amal represents this balance—she’s beautiful and exciting, yet also grounded and deeply committed to important causes.

 

John Mayer: The Celebrity Heartbreaker?

But not every man finds this balance as easily. John Mayer, another celebrity with a string of high-profile relationships, has Venus in Virgo.

 

This suggests he’s drawn to hardworking, self-improving women—many of his famous exes, like Jennifer Aniston and Katy Perry, fit this description. Yet Mayer’s Venus is in the 12th House, which adds a layer of secrecy or escapism to his relationships. This placement suggests that Mayer may be more interested in the fantasy or romantic ideal of love than in grounding a relationship in reality, which is why he’s often caught in the “girlfriend” phase, without moving toward lasting commitment.

 

Leonardo DiCaprio: The Eternal Bachelor?

Another example of a man navigating these astrological dynamics is Leonardo DiCaprio, known for dating models and celebrities like Gisele Bündchen and Bar Refaeli.

 

DiCaprio has Venus in Scorpio, a sign known for its intensity and passion. His attraction to “sexy” women is clear in his romantic history, but that’s just one side of the equation.

Like Mayer, DiCaprio hasn’t yet found someone who embodies the qualities of the Moon.

 

His Moon is in Libra, a sign associated with class, harmony, and partnership. When DiCaprio eventually settles down, it’s likely to be with someone less flashy and more aligned with the values of long-term partnership, someone who brings peace, balance, and a quieter life.

Leonardo DiCaprio also has the Moon Square Saturn in the 10th house. And this actually suggests something very, very different. And like George Clooney, sometimes we can tell that the guy has hit the jackpot when he starts dating the type of woman that he doesn’t typically date.

 

Conclusion: When Men Are Ready to Commit

The key takeaway from these examples is that while a man’s attraction to certain women (as shown by Venus) may drive his dating choices, it’s often his emotional needs (the Moon) that dictate when he’s ready to settle down. George Clooney didn’t change the type of woman he was dating; he changed into a person who became more mature and ready for commitment.

Suppose you’re a man struggling to find the right partner or questioning your past relationships. In that case, astrology can offer insights into what personal transformation you need to make to shift from serial dating to serious commitment. And for women, similar principles apply—you, too, can gain clarity on your own romantic journey through astrology.

Interested in finding out more about your relationship dynamics? Consider booking an astrological consultation with me to explore your chart and unlock the deeper meaning behind your romantic experiences.

 

Want to Learn Astrology?

If you’re a practitioner or someone who advises others, astrology can be an invaluable tool for understanding relationship dynamics without relying on personal biases. Join my classes and learn how to read charts, so you can better guide clients or friends on their journey toward love and commitment.

At Selfstrology Academy, we start from the basics, requiring no prior knowledge. Each astrological term and concept is curated and scaffolded, with relatable class and live examples. To learn more about obtaining a structured education in astrology, visit Selfstrology Academy or contact us at hello@selfstrology.com or WhatsApp: +65 8138 3615.

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